Why I am skipping Christmas this year.

​I have this dream. Of my partner-to-be and I cuddling up during our annual winter retreat. During this retreat we envision the next year of our life into being. And then we go and create it. Together. As a team. 

When I feel into this dream I feel our love, our connection and our joined purpose, passion and power to change the world. The feeling of this dream makes me cry tears of joy.

But right now, as I am writing this, I feel sad.

There will be many years I will get to experience this dream and I am already grateful for all of them. But with 12 days to go untill Christmas, I stuggle to believe the winter of 2021 will be one of them.

I am used to celebrating Christmas on my own and have always enjoyed it. But as from now on, I am skipping Christmas until I can celebrate it the way I dream of doing: with my partner.

Does that mean I am lonely? No.
Does that mean I am unhappy? No.
Does that mean I am desperate? No.

It just means that December is a month like any other month.
And the 25th a Saturday like any other Saturday.